MAY 24, 1998: “My Declaration” …


I returned from the gym to find Mitch pacing frantically as I pulled into the driveway, but before I could put the car in park, he jumped into the passenger seat and said, “DRIVE! We have to get to the hospital NOW!”

Fifteen minutes later, in a family-filled emergency room, He and Mitch finally got their chance to meet. Mom, Grandma, and Christian had been in an accident!

Amidst all the chaos and before I even realized it, I found the two of them outside of the emergency room in what seemed to be a heavy conversation. According to Mitch, they’d been speaking about the expectations and boundaries they had for one another, and when the conversation was done, they shook hands and returned to the waiting room. It was a 10-ton weight off my shoulders because I still loved Him and very much needed his approval before I could move forward with Mitch.

The six days that followed the accident were a whirlwind of excitement! Mitch was overjoyed that He had given him his blessing and went full steam ahead with the plans he had for our future. He had called his mom that Sunday night, gone to see a jeweler on Tuesday and called his travel agent on Wednesday. He wanted to get married on a beach in Tahiti the weekend of my birthday that September. Especially exciting was the fact that Mitch had asked that he finally be allowed to go Christian’s school, meet his teachers, be added to the “pick up list” and take him out to a special lunch that afternoon, just the two of them, which, he did. If only I’d known that on what began as a beautiful day chocked full of hope for an entire future things would go so tragically wrong.


I’ll take you just the way you are, imperfect words inside the perfect song. I feel you closer than you are, but I’ve been waiting far too long. It’s my declaration to anyone whose listening … You’re my inspiration as I stand alone against the world. Cause you love and you bleed, and you stole my soul to set me free … It’s my declaration.  Do you care what I believe, ‘cause I’m still breathin’? Or that I wear your heart upon my sleeve? Sometimes I think you never knew, the only truth I see is you. It’s you. And are there any words to say that would ever mean enough, when the light runs from the day, will the darkness be too much? Will I ever be enough? {David Cook}