FEBRUARY 7, 2020: “The Feeling” …

AUGUST 22, 2019: The night that changed everything for me and mine. It was the night my husband took his own life, and yes, I physically “felt it happen”. Sufficed to say that there are still so many parts of that night and what led up to it that are very unclear in my mind, as this trauma has obviously affected both me and our daughter in unimaginable and irreversible ways.

That being said, what I do clearly and vividly remember was sitting in a room alone trying to get a hold of myself and wrap my head around what was happening to my family. Then, at just before midnight, I felt it! I had an adrenalin dump and it felt like someone had punched me in the gut and knocked the wind out of me. I literally couldn’t breathe. The next morning, August 23rd, the police chief of our town came to find me in the hospital where our daughter was being treated for her own trauma and suicidal thoughts as a result of what he’d done. As he headed toward me with “that look” on his face, I already knew what he was going to say.

“Mrs. Williamson, we did, unfortunately, locate your husband in his car this morning with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head. I am so sorry to inform you that he is in fact deceased.”

At which point I fell to the ground with a guttural wail that I’m told could be heard throughout the hospital. This was, in fact, the worst feeling I have ever had in my life before. Thank you for asking and I apologize if this was a little “heavy”.

{The Real Cat Williamson On Quora}