… because if only you knew how long it took me to finally embrace this beautifully broken angel living inside my heart who didn’t think she was “lovable” for just under forty years, you’d understand why I carry this picture of her in my wallet, displayed in my bedroom, bathroom, and office, and in an utmost place of honor (just below the God who made me) in the most sacred temple I frequent: MY MIND!
For I am fearfully and wonderfully made!
(Psalm 139:14)
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness.
(Colossians 3:12)
Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness.
(Seneca)
“I get to love you! It’s the best thing that I’ll ever do! I get to love you! It’s a promise I’m making to you! Whatever may come, your heart I will choose! Forever I’m yours! Forever I do! I GET TO LOVE YOU!”
(Ruelle … and ME!)
Call it insanity. Call it pure vanity. Call it an over-inflated if not a narcissistic and conceited ego the size of eternity. If she was good enough for God to speak into Creation so “fearfully and wonderfully made” and good enough for His Son, Jesus, to die for, then she’s good enough for me to plaster pictures of on my heart and in my home. And please don’t confuse the aforementioned “narcissism” with healthy narcissism. Appropriate levels self-love, regard, confidence, and sufficiency while remaining humble enough to conceptualize just how “powerfully insignificant” our places are in all of this is one of the benchmarks for human survival. If we don’t think highly enough of ourselves, why even bother attempting to fight our way to sur-THRIVE-al?
“Reparenting.” It’s everything! The first day in your adult life that you’re able to show that broken kid you once were (or the kid you never got to be) some empathy, grace, unconditional love, and compassion, will be the first day of the rest of your life. I call “that day” my second birthday, and yes, my friends, I remember exactly where I was when I began the reparenting of “younger me”. It was April 8, 2008, and it truly was the beginning of who I’ve become.
(“Hey! Younger You! RISE UP!)
Do you have a picture of “younger you” in your vicinity? If so, I applaud you! If no, I cannot urge you enough to find your favorite picture of yourself at age “whenever you started breaking” and speak to that precious child IMPECCABLY every day as if they were your own … kindly, softly, and lovingly … ’cause, “WINK! WINK!” … you ARE your own!
The Diary Of My Perfection 
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