I DID IT!

I am now “ASIST” (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training) certified. I’d say it was an emotionally tough 48 hours, but that wouldn’t be quite true. There were definitely a couple of moments when I felt myself potentially sliding backwards, like during a video reenactment of a 911 suicide call with the sound of a double-barrel shotgun being loaded and death certificates being filled out on the widescreen. Still. No tears. Not a single one. I refuse to look back with sorrow, agony, or regret at the devastation in my life.

I only want to look ahead!

In addition to the life-saving skills I learned, the most powerful takeaway wasn’t skill related at all. You see, when I walked into that facility it was packed. Forty something people were all there to be volunteer trained, and even some who traveled to Dallas from other states to teach the class. Keep in mind that an inventory of the trainees revealed “regular people” from many different jobs, professions, statuses, and groups. While some, like me, had either lost a loved one to suicide or survived an attempt of their own, most were not in either category. It was a random group of concerned citizens who truly believe that suicide is a serious and growing epidemic society is facing who just wanted to find a way to help. It reminded me, yet again, that this world isn’t as dark and lonely as it often seems, and there are still good people in it.

While I pray to God that I never get that call and have to put these skills to use, statistics say that I probably will. I’M PREPARED! God allowed me be broken so that I could become a Light in the dark and live a life of use to others in His name. I am bound and determined to maintain every SINGLE ounce of the resilience I’ve fought so hard to earn going forward and for the rest of my days on this Earth.

TELL YOUR HEART TO BEAT AGAIN

You’re shattered like you’ve never been before. The life you knew in a thousand pieces on the floor. And words fall short in times like these when this world drives you to your knees. You think you’re never gonna get back to the you that used to be. Tell your heart to beat again. Close your eyes and breathe it in. Let the shadows fall away. Step into the light of grace. Yesterday’s a closing door. You don’t live there anymore. Say goodbye to where you’ve been and tell your heart to beat again. “Beginning”. Just let that word wash over you. It’s alright now, love’s healing hands have pulled you through. So, get back up, take step one. Leave the darkness, feel the Sun. ‘Cause your story’s far from over and your journey’s just begun. Tell your heart to beat again. Close your eyes and breathe it in. Let the shadows fall away. Step into the light of grace. Yesterday’s a closing door. You don’t live there anymore. Say goodbye to where you’ve been and tell your heart to beat again. Let every heartbreak and every scar be a picture that reminds you Who has carried you this far. ‘Cause love sees farther than you ever could. In this moment Heaven’s working everything for your good. {Danny Gokey}